This morning, I was reflecting on something I’ve observed in my relationships. A pattern that I’ve been frustrated about. Many times my wife and sometimes my daughters seem to misinterpret what I say to them about some topic. In many cases, they hears almost the complete opposite. I ask myself, “Did I really just say the opposite of what I was trying to convey?”. As I go back over the words that I’ve said, I am confident that I said the right words. So what happened?

Recently I heard the following saying:

“I’ve learned that people will forget what you said, people will forget what you did, but people will never forget how you made them feel.“

How can this be true? Aren’t the actual words Jesus’ spoke indispensable? We treasure people’s words all the times from books. We go back and listen to videos of speeches and interviews to replay what someone said, right?

I did a cursory Biblical search on this and was immediately struck with, what I would almost say, remorse. A verse I know all too well popped up and made it clear as day.

“If I speak in the tongues of men and of angels, but have not love, I am a noisy gong or a clanging cymbal. And if I have prophetic powers, and understand all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have all faith, so as to remove mountains, but have not love, I am nothing. If I give away all I have, and if I deliver up my body to be burned, but have not love, I gain nothing.” 1 Corinthians 13:1-3 (ESV)

Talk about a proverbial punch in the face. Does my family just hear a noisy gong when I speak to them because I’m lacking in love? Such a wonderful reminder that the foundation of all we do is in love.

It doesn’t stop there though. Of course, you can’t get away from Proverbs for some life lesson nugget.

“Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.” Proverbs 16:24 (ESV)

“A soft answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.” Proverbs 15:1 (ESV)

Notice how nothing in these verses mentions anything about the actual words being spoken. There are more examples. But I think the point is clear – while we want to speak “truth to our neighbor” (Ephesians 4:25), there is something beyond just the words that we speak.

So how do we “have love” like described in 1 Corinthians 13? Of course, the source of love is God. There are plenty of verses related to this.

“Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God.” 1 John 4:7

“God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” Romans 5:5

“The fruit of the Spirit is love…” Galatians 5:22

This is such a good reminder for me to seek love first. Abiding in Jesus is so important to loving others (the second greatest commandment, by the way) that we just simply cannot love without him. So why would we want to speak truth of any kind, if we aren’t expressing love? Maybe I need to focus on understanding how to love my family without words before being a noisy gong or clanging cymbal.

Mid March is the due date!

A few weeks ago my family and I were in San Jose, Mexico (basically Cabo San Lucas).  We were privileged to stay at a really nice resort with my brother-in-law and his family.  The service and accommodations were wonderful.  One morning when I was sitting alone admiring the infinite pool and observing the other vacationers, I pondered about how comfortable I felt in that moment and how it related to my destiny.  It’s kind of an odd thing to say now, but that’s the best way I can explain it.  A flood of thoughts came to me about my comfortableness and how it was probably related to money and being in a place where everything was provided.

For several years now I’ve had a growing desire to build up wealth in order to give in abundance.  The idea of being able to give significant amounts of money to friends, family, church, and society is really exciting to me.  However, the last year I have also been dwelling on the Bible verse Luke 18:25 (can also be found in other gospels): “For it is easier for a camel to go through the eye of a needle than for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God.”  Would it ever be possible for a camel to go through the eye of a needle?  The answer to this is never, unless God performed a miracle.  As I thought about this more, I questioned whether building wealth would actually be a wise venture.  If it is virtually impossible for a rich man to enter the kingdom of God, then why would I want to be a rich man?  What is it about being rich that makes it so difficult to even enter the kingdom of God?

My “epiphany” on the shaded pool lounger gave some possible answers to this question.  I found myself so comfortable with my surroundings that I hadn’t really felt reliant or the need for God in my life.  I had all I needed right?  Good food, exceptional service, and the occasional Chi-Chi cocktail by the poolside bar was my only worry in life.  My one year daughter is the one exception to this, but my point is that momentarily I questioned if my destiny in life even mattered.  That is an extreme way to put it, but what if I did feel that way?

I don’t think money or wealth in itself is the danger.  I think the danger is that money and wealth can cause us to think we have full control over our lives.  Lately my wife and I have been watching the TV show “Smallville” and the character of Lex Luthor depicts this extremely well.  He has so much wealth that he seemingly has full control of his life and other people’s lives.  I personally don’t think it’s impossible for a rich man to live each and every moment abiding in the Lord, but I can definitely see how it would be very difficult to.  I’d imagine that you’d have to live each and every day detached to your wealth so that if it all vanished in a single day you’d still be content with your life in the Lord.

One thing I am still thinking about is the dichotomy of these recent thoughts and my remaining desire to build wealth for the sake of giving.  Money is a part of our world whether we like it or not.  Why not master the skill of building wealth and using that wealth for good?  In the end wisdom from the Lord will answer these questions.  And if there is grace for my family and I to build wealth, may I live in it at all times seeking true riches from the Lord.

For some reason I find it difficult to think about how my daughter Claire may not ever know about a ‘home phone’ or a pay phone. Cell phones have changed us forever. It took me years and years to finally get a cell phone. I waited until I graduated college. Ironically my parents were the ones that wanted me to have one more than anybody else. Back in the day you could get a phone line with good old SBC (formerly Southwestern Bell, formerly AT&T, formerly some other names). My thought about it at the time was that if I’m out of the house, then I’m out doing something with other people, and I don’t want to be talking on the phone. Needless to say I changed, but how could I not?

Cell phones are possibly the center of our existence now, even when we don’t want them to be. Before bed, there have been many times I’ve played a game on my phone before I fall asleep. When I first wake up, sometimes I click on my phone to quickly check my mail or watch some MLB highlights. We answer our phones during meals. We do a quick search on the internet when we are out with friends and want to know the facts about something. When I walk from my car to my office (just one block), it’s assured that I will see someone using their phone on the street or on the elevator. We are all culprits.

It’s difficult for me to think about. I love the fact that we’ve technologically figured out how to connect ourselves to instant communication and information. I love the fact that we can call anyone from anywhere in time of emergency. And it’s even more amazing that I can call my brother in California and talk to him via video on phone. But has the cell phone taken over our lives and our thoughts to a fault? I think so. We don’t really plan as much anymore. We just say, “I’ll text you the location of where we’re meeting” instead of making the decision right then and there. We maybe aren’t as present as we used to be with those around us. We are more impatient than ever about needing to know something immediately.

Many people may disagree with me. This could just be a self reflection of how I think I need to change. Or maybe I’m not embracing the technology enough. Or possibly I am sad for some reason that we are in a world where we are so reliant on a piece of technology. I don’t know. I do believe though that it’s something we should think about and consider.

When it comes to sports, some may consider America’s Pastime dying.  However, in my life, baseball has been slowly reviving itself over the last several years.  My baseball career ended in the 6th grade after a season on the Red Sox in AAA “Majors”.  During that last year of baseball, I essentially played outfield for only a couple of innings a game, batted 8th or 9th, and probably had a sub .200 avg (that’s just a guess).  I hadn’t grown much at that point while pretty much everyone around me was bigger and stronger.  So I was a small kid trying to hit against pitchers who were pitching up to 50mph (and probably higher).  After that experience, I pretty much quit baseball altogether.  I still liked watching it on occasion.  I still remember the Atlanta Braves dominating for a few years in the 90s when they had that trio of pitchers – Smoltz, Maddux, and Glavine.  But aside from that, I moved on from baseball.

Fast forward about 10 years to 2005.  My friend Chuck asks me if I want to play in a fantasy baseball league with him and some other friends.  I reluctantly said yes.  I had no idea who the top players in baseball were at the time with the exception of maybe A Rod or some other well known star.  Little did I know that was the beginning of baseball’s revival in my life.  I fell in love with baseball again.  Albeit, I loved it for the stats,  but I still loved it.  I didn’t even have an MLB team to root for (one of the few downsides to living in Austin).  But over the next several years I relearned the sport, kept track of players, looked at box scores, and went to some games.  Two years in a row I managed to make it to a Cubs game at Wrigley Field.  Somehow, this sport that had left a bitter taste in my mouth became one of the more enjoyable sports for me to keep up with.  Maybe enough time had passed for me to let go of the game, or maybe I had come to grips with the fact that I was just bad at the sport when I always thought of myself as a good athlete.  It doesn’t matter really.  What matters is that I appreciate a sport that has a huge connection to the history of our nation.  It’s remarkable how much history is linked to this sport, all of which I have just scratch the surace.

Fast forward again to around 2009.  My office decides to have a softball league in town.  My free time was scarce due to my involvement with ultimate, but I eventually was able to commit to a full season after I decided to quit Ultimate competitively.  Then a year later some friends formed their own softball team.  Softball is basically little league for adults.  You’ll find anywhere from ex-college baseball players to people like me who hadn’t swung a bat in over 10 years.  It’s great.  It takes you back to those Saturdays at the ball park playing AA little league where there is nothing but fun and joy as you play the game of baseball.

Just yesterday I was watching some random music video and in it there was a girl carrying a baseball bat while walking around the countryside with two of her friends.  I immediately thought of the movie “The Sandlot” and all the memories I had as a kid playing baseball.  There is something comforting about it all.  My favorite memory from when I was younger was playing home run derby at my friend’s house.  It was just three of us, but we spent the better part of the morning trying to hit the baseballs as hard as we could.  Later that day I had a little league game at Bishop Field (AAA American on the Mets).  My typical hitting career in AAA was get walked 90% of the time.  I had a small strike zone and it was the first year for kids to start pitching.  That day we were the visiting team and I was the lead-off hitter.  Despite having a full season of taking the first pitch, my muscle memory from that morning took over and I swung.  I think the ball hit the center field fence.  I watched the ball more than actually running the bases because I only made it to first base.  If only I could have played home run derby every day before games.

I can’t remember why or how it happened, but the verses from Isaiah 55 kept showing up in our lives, in our thoughts, and in our hearts during the time when my wife and I were engaged. It soon became a theme for our wedding. As we were thinking of a website name, we thought it would be cool to link the site name to this chapter since it was so integral to the beginning or our lives together. Here is a little excerpt from it:

“For my thoughts are not your thoughts,
Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord.
“For as the heavens are higher than the earth,
So are My ways higher than your ways,
And My thoughts than your thoughts.
…
For you shall go out with joy,
And be led out with peace;
The mountains and the hills
Shall break forth into singing before you,
And all the trees of the field shall clap their hands.
Instead of the thorn shall come up the cypress tree,
And instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle tree;
And it shall be to the Lord for a name,
For an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.”
(Isaiah 55:8-9,12-13)

But why a new website? The simple boring reason is that some other web space we were using is going away and we needed another place to post thoughts, pictures, and videos. The cool exciting reason is that I’ve recently entered the realm of computer programming, and I thought it would be fun to create a website. This blog (as you probably know) was not created designed by me, but it’s a placeholder (maybe) for the meantime until I can create a super awesome fantastic website. We’ll see if that actually happens.

I’ve never been a big blogging type of person, but my wife enjoys cataloging events and people through pictures and thoughts. Most of this blog may end up being about our 1 year old daughter (Happy Birthday Claire!).

Until then, go check out Sufjan Steven’s track “All the Trees of the Field Will Clap Their Hands” http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yvq-GQP-VyY (I always liked this live version the most).